Not everyone can say they’ve seen their life story reflected back to them onscreen—and even fewer people can claim the experience of having said story adapted by an internationally famous actor. But that’s precisely what’s happened to author Lidia Yuknavitch, whose 2011 memoir The Chronology of Water formed the basis for Kristen Stewart’s celebrated directorial debut of the same name.
The film—which stars Imogen Poots as Yuknavitch and chronicles the author’s myriad experiences with sexual abuse, addiction, and competitive swimming, to say nothing of her profound coming-of-age as an artist—is out this week. Ahead of its release, Vogue spoke to Yuknavitch about giving Stewart room to create her own interpretation of the book, shifting gears between writing and painting, the kinship she feels with Stewart and Poots, and (spoiler!) why she still hasn’t seen the film.
Vogue: What does it feel like to see your book adapted into a film?
Lidia Yuknavitch: It’s pretty mind-blowing. I don’t really think of it the way that maybe other people do; I think Kristen made her own autonomous, rebel-yell art and my book was sort of a launching pad, or a kind of artistic inspiration, but what she made is all hers. It’s her art, and I could not be happier for her. I’m over the moon.
What was it like collaborating with Kristen?
Well, I wasn’t collaborating all that much. At the very beginning, she asked me a bunch of questions about people’s reactions or emotional intensities, and I would answer them, and she’d be like, “Cool,” and then I wouldn’t hear from her for a while. [Laughs.] I’d get another set of questions, and I’d answer them, and she’d be like, “Got it.” I think the collaboration was more of the heart and of a kind of sensibility that we share as unapologetic mammals who have something in their hearts and something in their guts and bodies that they have to find a form for. Maybe our deepest, most intimate collaboration just happens because we’re two women artists who found each other in the world, and if we don’t help each other, nobody else will.
What was your experience of seeing the film for the first time like?
You might not like this answer, but I actually haven’t seen it yet! It’s literally killing me that I have not seen it, so hopefully I’m not going to die. I’ve read interviews with Kristen and reviews and things like that, and people I know and love have seen it and eagerly sent me their impressions; plus, I kind of get her vibe, so I feel like I’ve seen it even though I haven’t. It’s still killing me, though, so the day I see it, everyone check on me and make sure I’m still alive.
Had you ever thought about who might play you in a movie prior to this experience?
Not really, because I’m an introvert. I’m wired non-neurotypically, so I don’t think about things like that, but when I see clips or images of Imogen, all the hairs on my body stand up; not because we can look like each other or anything like that, but just because I can see that she has an extraordinary ability to inhabit emotional intensity and a whole range. I can already tell that about her, and I suspect she’s an extraordinary person and clearly an extraordinary actress. I mean, she’s not playing me; she’s stepping into a story that, yeah, sure, it’s my version, because this stuff happened to me personally, but all women step into these stories. Our stories aren’t all the same, but the parts we’re supposed to keep clean and pretty and quiet have stuff underneath them, and she was willing to step into that. I don’t think about who would play me in a movie, but what I do think is, you know, Holy fuck, there’s a woman who is willing to step into the underneath-story and play it out.
What does work look like for you these days?
Well, I haven’t been writing for over a year because I have some personal life stuff going on, but hundreds of paintings are coming out of me, so I’m very curious about that. I’m having to talk to them and ask them what they’re about. Although last week, for the first time in a while, some novel stuff started coming out of me, so apparently I have the very, very beginnings of a novel going, and once they start coming, there’s nothing I can do about it.
This conversation has been edited and condensed.
