Kendall Jenner Gets Real About How Social Media Has Affected Her Anxiety

When I think of social media and anxiety,

I mean, holy moly, that s like a loaded question.

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Personally what s affected my anxiety the most is the,

the amount of negativity that I see.

There s just literally too much.

Like I find that the more I m looking at a screen

the more detached I feel with my own body

or to like what s happening right in front of me.

My relationship with social media is, you know

a bit addictive right now, which I don t like

and I m not proud to say that, but I also feel

like that s something that probably

most of us can relate to.

Like, I don t like that I feel the need

to have social media in the first place.

There really is like no escaping it.

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There s plenty of research out there

that really demonstrates that social media

acts very much like an addiction.

It stimulates the same part of the brain as substance use.

When you think about it

you are always looking for that positive reinforcement.

Right.

The idea of what could happen

whether you re going to get a like, or whether

you know, somebody is going to repost you, really

keeps you coming back very much like an addiction.

Right. I don t know.

Is that something just as society we re conditioned

from like a very young age to like

feel like we need that validation?

That sense of not getting that

enough positive reinforcement from our home environment

not feeling rooted, allows us to really look

outside of ourselves for a reward.

Right.

And I think that social media really pulls for that.

It s so interesting that you say that

because a lot of the feedback,

if, if it is negative that I ve ever

gotten is like, Oh, you re setting a bad example

or this is horrible.

I wouldn t want my kid to see this, or

What do you think when parents say,

for example to you, when they say

you know, you re setting a bad example for my kids?

I don t know how much you know about my family or us

but there s, there s an assumption of the kind of people

that we are or who we are that I could say pretty

confidently is pretty inaccurate.

I mean, I, we have a reality TV show, so a lot

of people know a lot of our lives,

Keeping Up With the Kardashians, yes.

But I think that there s still such a lack

of actually knowing our character, who we are

When you think about even even a reality show

is going to show the highlights of your life.

Right.

And when somebody really thinks about like keeping up

how do you keep up with the Kardashians?

Right?

It is obviously either can be used

as a motivation to be your very best

or it can be used as an impossibility.

Right.

If somebody is really struggling

with identity issues

Right.

and with confidence issues

the idea of keeping up with this image

of somebody that you admire may really seem impossible.

And perhaps that s part of the sort

of rationale

[Kendall] Right.

as to why for some folks, right?

You can check me by the way, you can totally sit here

and be like, this is what this is what people think.

Can you give me an example

of a time when you ve kinda have like

would highlight a peak moment

of anxiety that is related to social media for you?

Something that like boils my blood

that like really frustrates me and like

I think upsets me the most is when it s someone

claiming a false narrative for me.

The internet, I guess bases things

off of such small moments.

Yes.

with no context

[Dr. Partida] Right.

They don t know the before or the after

and they ll take that and run with it and then

completely judge you based off of this one little thing

That s the thing.

I think there s a certain loss of control

of your own sense of self.

Right.

And I think that people

can kind of edit it to their own to fit

their own purpose

[Kendall] Right.

and to fit their own sense

of reality or lack of reality.

And then you just become like a canvas

upon which people project their own stuff onto.

And it s gotta be really difficult.

I think that that s probably very similar to

what children feel when they re bullied online, you know

you post something and then somebody can take

something that you might give them and really

distort it in such a way that comes back as very aggressive.

You know, I, I pride myself

on being a pretty decent human being.

Like, I don t think I m a bad person or anything.

So I wouldn t, I m not saying it s, you know

something actually bad that I would have posted or whatever.

It s just, it s something as simple as they

didn t like what I looked like in that photo.

And I m sure that getting that type

of feedback does something to you,

[Kendall] Yeah.

does something to your confidence.

Even, even Kendall Jenner.

I m sure getting that type

of feedback does something to you.

[Kendall] A hundred percent.

How do you feel when you get sort of that type

of critical feedback?

I have moments of feeling like I m breaking

or feeling like I can t take it anymore.

Cause sometimes it does feel like it just

I can never do anything right.

Yeah. Sometimes.

You know what I mean?

Can never please everybody

Right all of the time.

So, so this, this period of intense anxiety for you,

it seems to me it s a perfect example

of this sort of separation of yourself.

Here s the

Kendall at home little young girl

who is now being pushed

on the world stage,

having to sort of play this role out

knowing that your image is going to be out there

for everyone to consume.

There s gotta be sort of this

And judge.

So how do you think that has that

that projection of you in social media

how has that affected your ability to really kind

of feel anchored and connected

to your say authentic self?

For lack of a better word.

Right. Well, it s just interesting

because there are, first of all,

so many images of me on the internet ones

that I m fine with and ones that I don t necessarily like

you know what I mean?

And a lot of the times the ones that I don t like are

the ones that get more attention because they re the ones

that everyone wants to kind of take and rip apart.

So I think that I ve become numb to all of that

in a way that took time though.

And that took a lot of like talking to myself and, and

you know, hyping myself up.

And because of social media, everything is highlighted.

Everything is heightened, whether good or bad.

I feel like most of my social media anxiety is

actually more the overwhelmingness of it all

Overstimulation, right?

When you realize that our brains

are really not designed to be bombarded

by all the stimulus that s coming our way, all of the time

Right. What is actually like psycho, like

what is happening?

[Dr. Partida] What s happening in our brains, right?

Yes.

I think that, you know

that the sense of overwhelm is very real

and that there s a point in which the brain can no

longer process all the information that s coming our way.

And so there s an actual shutdown

very similar to what happens in a trauma response.

It stimulates that sort

of animal impulse of fight flight or freeze response.

And if we can t process everything that s happening

then we start to freeze

and we start to feel like we re no longer in the world.

So there is a sense of derealization that happens.

And, you know, I think with, with

COVID really keeping young people

out of relationships and social interactions

We don t have that human connection anymore

which I feel like we as human beings need it.

Well, that s the ultimate irony, isn t it?

That the internet can social media can really

allow us to feel like we have millions

and millions of friends in the world.

When in reality, we could be very lonely right at home.

And it s the sense that you start

to trade your real life for the imagined life.

We re constantly being bombarded

by a new role model or by a new standard of beauty

or buy a new desire that we just can t quite

be adequate enough to meet.

And I think this is the dangerous part where a lot

of young people really fall

into a hurtful clinical depression

Yeah.

That oftentimes leaves

into either self-harm, addiction.

Yeah.

We ve seen that addiction has really increased

during this time or, you know, worst a suicide.

I feel like it s something that we re now like stuck in.

[Dr. Partida] Do you know what I mean? Yeah.

Like how do we now, there is no reversing?

I hope that one of the things that we learned

from this is exactly what you ve said is

that there is a need for us to be connected in real time.

That kind of content is critical for our wellbeing.

[Kendall] Yeah.

It s part of, it has to be part of our

mental health I think that s

one of our tips of the day is go give someone a hug.

So something that I m asking, all the professionals

on this series is just some, I dunno, tips

tricks tools that you can kind of

that the viewers can take home with them

or they ll probably already home, but take away

with them and really apply to their life

Sure. or their lifestyle.

So, I would say probably four tips.

One is being aware of your intention when you engage

in social media, why are you doing it?

Why are you connecting?

Recognizing that once you put an image out there

you may not always have control

over how that image is going to be consumed.

I think third, recognizing that addiction is very real

in social media and that it operates

very much like any other addiction.

And so setting some limits

appropriate limits and boundaries is really critical.

And I would say, lastly is set some time

for yourself to really socialize with people.

Yeah.

Stay connected to those that love you

and really recognize that no human being is an Island.

We are all, you know, human beings who socialize

and need to socialize in order to stay protected.

Yeah. Well, thank you so much.

Thank you, this has been thoroughly amazing.

I really have enjoyed being here with you.

I think it s interesting cause a lot

of our conversation about social media

was how like overwhelming everything can be.

And I think even just talking

about it was really overwhelming.

Like it s almost a sense of validation

hearing it from a professional or

hearing it from a doctor.

Like, okay I m not the only one

that s dealing with these thoughts

or emotions and, and how

invasive it feels like in my life

but it s good to be aware of it all.

And it s good to talk about it and kind of let it out.

And then now you can be aware, process

and hopefully move forward.

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